1 Year, 2 Stories

Version 1:

It was a shitty year. Year 2 Sem 2 was shit. Year 3 Sem 1 was quite shitty as well.

I don’t understand why nearly everyone that I know of can escape from the shitty overall B- curse for their modules except me. I cannot accept the fact that I am always near the bottom of the bell curve. What is the worst is that most of the B- that I have been getting are shitty level 3000 history modules, except for those related to China history. If I am already doing so badly for level 3000, I will get even more shit for honors modules.

Seeing everyone else do better than me in many different aspects- regardless academic, securing internships, accomplishing big projects, getting selected for exchange… is just making me depressed. It makes me feel damn lousy and shitty about myself. The feeling of getting unrecognized is shitty. I am never going to apply for any “prestige” programmes offered by the school again. No point trying because I will get rejected and shit all the same. I have given up on all things related to NUS.

Version 2: I had my fair share of trials and tribulations in 2014. Despite all the setbacks, it was an opportunity to find other opportunities for myself. Where I have been working may not sound as “prestigious” as government organisations and established MNCs. If big is not suitable for me, I will stick to small. The salad/rotisserie/franchising company where I am currently working at has tons of rivals in the salad business. But it was an eye-opening and humbling experience learning the different dimensions of starting a business from scratch and working your way up to establish a brand.

Be it doing something not history related, hosting delegates, interviewing and befriending strangers, helping the animal and human community, doing my 1st ever vocational dance exam…all called for me to step out of my security zones. I am grateful for the learning experience even though things can be further improved on, and I am glad to be given a chance to contribute on my part. 2015 calls for more initiative on my part to seek more open doors for myself. It is another uncertain year ahead but I will have to accept the challenge and take one step at a time.

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Version 2 is not meant to be the politically correct answer of how I should script my year. True that there were many times where I felt insignificant about myself because I am never good enough. But I learnt that you don’t have to climb up to the mountain top, be famous or score 10 A+s to prove your capabilities. Shall end off with the comic below which summaries my point nicely. Have a smooth sailing year ahead folks. 5645c161

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Sinful Xmas

Xmas period is a perfect excuse to sin, and I did exactly that this year. Unlike previous years, most of my relatives didn’t gather at my grandma’s house so I had the liberty to roam about instead of sitting around and watching tv. Yes I haven’t move back yet. I think I will be counting down to 2015 at her house too. The more the merrier anyway.

So where was I… Yes on sinning.

In the morning I engaged in capitalist practices and contributed to the Japan economy. Can you believe the snacks below cost over 50 bucks? Luckily $40 was offset by Asia Malls vouchers for UOB card holders.

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Glad to find Watapachi grape candy (did a review before, check it out if you haven’t!)

It is highly likely I will finish them all by myself, especially since the semester is starting again. Maybe I should start investing in granola bars for energy.

Oh before I forget, I have yet to introduce my boyfriend on this blog. Sorry to say but we have been maintaining a low key relationship. Since things have already stabilised for us, let me just make our status known. We even wore matching shirts today!

Photo of us in 3….2….1….

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GOTCHA!!!!

Okay apologies for the cold joke/ lameness if this wasn’t funny. In case you are wondering why the daruma only has 1 eye, it is because you are supposed to paint one eye while you make the wish, and paint the other when it comes true.

After that headed to Great World City to collect turkey.

Reached home, met my cousins who paid a last minute visit. Evidence here. I was holding onto one of their holiday homework because she asked me for help (Seriously who would do homework during xmas/chinese new year? I didn’t even want to touch my work stuff).

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Had subway and sushi for lunch. My mum and aunt prepared the ingredients while I wrapped them. In the event I am out of a job, I can work in a Japanese restaurant and be a professional sushi wrapper.

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Brought the smelly dog out for a walk when my cousins and the hopeless mahjong addicts went home.

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Then just blogged a review about Cuddles Cat Cafe and played candy crush. Basically that’s my no-social life xmas.

Here are some photos of the sinful food I have been indulging in for the past few days. Luckily I survived 2 hours of ballet just now.

Teegebäck chocolates and biscuits. It was a present, not that I am rich enough to buy them.

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Close ups. Sweet treats have never tasted so heavenly.

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Macaroons. Never a fan of them because they are too sweet for my liking. But I couldn’t stop for this particular one.

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And Rilakkuma fishcake from Kuriya. If they were Hello Kitty, I would have probably kept them till they decomposed. And yes that is abalone.

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Yesterday Starbucks had a 1 for 1 offer till 30 Dec. Bought Cookie Latte and Peppermint Mocha. It was a tumultuous journey back home. Try carrying your Starbucks carrier and laptop in 1 hand and umbrella in the other (it was raining heavily as usual), at the same time ensure not to spill the drinks, and the route from the MRT to your house has no shelter and is flooded with mud water due to construction.

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(Spell my name wrong somemore!)

I had 1/4 of both beverages and couldn’t sleep till 3am.

The sin of the month: gluttony! Abrupt ending here cos I have to finish up my work before the semester starts again. Just came back from visiting cat museum and catching up with my friend. Tired out. Mata ne!

Throwback Thursday: Cuddles Cat Cafe

Is this the last Thursday of the year already?! Let me do a throwback thursday then! Better settle the 2014 blog debts before the year ends. This is a long overdue post which I feel urged to blog about it as a crazy cat lady.

Cat cafes have become a hit here for the past year. It sounds appealing to many because they can worry about nothing, just play with cats, laugh at their funny antics (or maybe what humans see as amusing) and of course, post cat photos on social media. There is even a cat museum opening next year which my friend and I are going to sneak peek this Saturday.

I am not obsessed with cat cafes because I am already living in a pseudo cat cafe-my aunt’s house, and SPCA has tens of abandoned cats waiting for some love. Cat cafes have an admission fee and most of them limit the playtime to 1 hour. If you visit at the “wrong” timing where most cats are asleep, it would pretty much be a waste.

When Cuddles Cat Cafe opened at SCAPE, it generated a lot of hype. The shop space was the biggest amongst other cafes and was said to have the most number of cats. Most cats kittens aren’t local (as in majority of them aren’t adopted/rehomed strays, but bought). Since it was located directly below where I learnt ballet and my dance mate wanted to visit, we went before their official opening!

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The cafe had a really calming ambience. The aromatherapy was relaxing, the floors were furry and carpeted, there were comfy bean bag cushions everywhere. On the wall there was a gigantic poster plastered to show all the cafe’s cats. Most of them are mixed ragdolls and munchkins who are still kittens. Curious passerbys often crowd around the transparent shop window to witness the action.

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Anyway we didn’t manage to see all the kittens as stipulated in the poster as some of them are still not accustomed to humans and therefore not yet introduced in the cafe. Also, (according to them) Cuddles Cat Cafe was waiting for approval from AVA to let them accomodate more cats cos they had bigger space. One of the staff brought one kitten out to let us have a look before it ran back to hide again.

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"Don't bother me, human! Let me nap!"

Well overall the experience was okay, considering the fact that I didn’t visit other cafes so I can’t do a comparison. Regarding the shy kittens I just thought they probably needed more time to warm up to people since the cafe and the kittens are still in their infancy. In the subsequent weeks when I passed by the cafe, there are still as many people gathering at the shopfront to take photos, and customers playing with the kittens who look more active.

And just last week, Cuddles Cat Cafe got into a scandal regarding the inappropriate handling of kittens and 7 kittens died under their care before they opened. Too lazy to summarize; just go google it and prepare to feel digusted. The owner got some very serious bashing and AVA refused to renew their operating license, so he closed down the cafe and put it up for sale. Seriously?!

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I am glad that the dark side of Cuddles Cat Cafe (no matter how innocent the name sounds) got exposed, to inform the public about an unscrupulous shit who saw his business as a long term gain and his cats as a commodity, instead of promoting awareness of animal welfare.

The future of the cafe and its cats remains uncertain as of now. I hope the kittens find caring and sincere families if the cafe doesn’t re-open because they deserve a second life after all that happened.

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Since it’s xmas today…

Merry Xmas folks!

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I woke him up to take a selfie so that explains his grumpy face. Serves him right for sleeping on my laptop!…… Just kidding I am not that mean. He was already awake and he just happened to blink.

I will post my no-social life xmas photos in the next post if not this entry will be too long.

Treating Life as a Joke

Sometimes I have received enough sh*t in my life. Other than sucking it up and moving on, another coping mechanism is to go into denial and treat life as a big joke. I know this isn’t the best way of dealing with setbacks, but the situation just calls me to be a troll.

1. Sent out a resume/proposal but did not receive any reply. Even though it may be certain that you have been rejected, but…

Reaction: Hello? Did my resume/proposal end up in your junk email? I am sure it did! Check again! 

2. Rejected for an application after sending in the necessary documents (E.g. exchange, internship without interview)

Reaction: Did you even bother to read my application (properly)? 

3. A friend got a better grade than you for a module, even though he did worse than you for tests/assignments.

Reaction: I bet the prof checked the matric number against the namelist and identified his favourites (We arent allowed to write our names on our exam scripts so that the prof will not know the identity of the student, but who knows what is going on in their offices while they are marking? Just saying)

4. You got a grade which you think you don’t deserve after all the hard work

Reaction: The bell curve god is biased/ thanks prof for wasting my time with this module. 

5. You ended up on the wrong side of the bell curve…yet again!

Reaction: 哎哟往著胸口拍一拍呀勇敢站起来. 老天爱笨小孩 (我是笨小孩!)

(English translation- The heavens love stupid children. I am a stupid child)

Reaction: B for best. A for atrocious. (If only F stands for fantastic instead of fail)

Anyway, results release tomorrow. I am expecting bad news as usual. Nothing good has ever happened to me for my university life. Rejected, forgotten and insignificant.

50 random questions tag

Since work and all things about life is making me irritable, let me answer 50 random questions. Just take it as a “let’s get to know  each other better” post. I am too cranky to write anything constructive.

1: What was the last book you read?
“Body Language: How to know what’s REALLY being said” by James Borg.

2: Do you like roller coasters?
Yes, especially the upside-down ones!

3: Day or night?
Day.

4: What do you hear right now?
118 (a Singaporean drama) being broadcasted on TV

5: What would you name your son or daughter if you had one?
Probably something that is Japanese sounding. Because there are too many “Hui Mins”, “Rachels”, “Michelles” and “Benjamins” flooding the country.

6: Do you want kids? Why or why not?
Ideally yes, but that depends if I can find my Prince Charming or not!

7: What’s your favorite memory with your best friend(s)?
We used to draw our dream house (like those doll houses) during free periods in primary school.

8: How many times did it take you to pass your driver’s test?
None. I haven’t taken any. Cars are god damn expensive here you know? Even if I have a license I doubt I can afford a car.

9: The scariest dream you had?
Dreamt that my CAP fell to 2.3 during exam results release. School stuff is a living nightmare that always give me nightmares. Nightmare-ception!

10: How tall are you?
1.63m

11: The last thing you ate was…
Home-cooked fried rice for dinner.

12: A band you want to see live is…
WAGAKKI BAND!

13: Do you have a hero/someone you look up to? If so, who?
I can’t  think of any right now to be honest.

14: Do you like to swim?
Only when the water is not cold.

15: Things you look for in a guy/girl?
-Accepts me for who I am instead of being a control freak.
-Shares some common interests if not I will find it difficult to talk to him.
-Takes regular effort to exercise and stay in shape.
-Must not ask me redundant questions like “What are you doing now”. I don’t feel obliged to update busybodies what I am doing every 10 minutes.
-Must not be interested in thighs, breasts and legs.

I can go on but that will take forever. Next!

16: Has a book ever upset you?
Yes. I got upset because I have no clue what sh*t the author was trying to make!

17: What was the first instrument you learned to play? (if any)
Piano.

18: Some of your hobbies include…
Day dreaming, dancing, shopping, reading anything that interests me, scrolling aimlessly through instagram and pinterest

19: How do you deal with anger?
Suck it up and pretend that everything is fine. Last time I used pen it down in my diary but the process makes me recall the incident which makes me even more angry.

20: Something you like about your appearance is…
I can’t  think of any.

21: What was the last movie you watched?
Konkurito (Concrete), directed by Hiromu Nakamura. It is loosely based on the infamous murder of Junko Furata. Even though I like Sosuke Takaoko’s acting, the movie was damn sick especially with the dizzy camera shots, the already sickening murder case, and the sickening fact that the murderers’ punishment didn’t justify the crime.

Okay that’s enough. Next!

22: Do you have a favorite ghost story? What about a personal ghost story?
None, for both questions. Don’t  believe in ghosts.

23: Where is the farthest from home that you’ve gone?
Australia

24: Have you met anyone through Tumblr that you’d like to meet irl?
I have no Tumblr, so no one!
Okayy if I change Tumblr to Instagram, I would like to meet @illscripts.

25: Do you look like your parents?
A lot of people have commented that I look like my Dad.

26: Things you have in common with your parents?
Dad- height, don’t get fat easily, quiet in front of strangers. I can’t  think of anymore.
Mum- DIY, OCD, worrying too much.

27. What is to the right of you?
My aunt, who is playing Candy Crush.

28: A favorite memory with a sibling?
I have no siblings.

29: What is something you wish you’d done?
I wish I continued learning Malay so that I wouldn’t  have made a fool of myself when speaking it.

30: What are some of your favorite blogs?
Tofugu, jisforjapan, Cheeserland.
And of course my blog!

31: Do you sing in the shower?
Only when I am in a good mood. The 3 songs I will definitely sing are 橄榄树(The Olive Tree), 东方红(The East is Red) and the song from London Choco Roll commercial.

32: Something others have described you as…
Hardworking (Don’t mean to sound boastful but… 😅)

33: Name of every pet you’ve had…
I used to keep fish last time but didn’t name them. My aunts’ cats don’t  count because I don’t own them.

34: Your favorite superhero?
None. Not a fan of superheros.

35: Two of your fears are…
Fear of failing and fear of death.

36: What you’re majoring in in college/what you plan to major in…
History

37: What is your favorite season?
Singapore has no 4 seasons to choose from.

38: The best vacation you took?
Royal Caribbean vacation.

39: Why your best friend is your best friend.
Because fate has it.

40: How did you come across your favorite band?
I forgot how but I was surfing Youtube for Japanese songs and it led me to Wagakki Band. The very 1st MV I watched was Senbozakura (it was formerly sung by vocaloids) and I loved how they arranged their cover.

41: Occupations you wanted as a little kid?
Teacher and Scientist. Now teaching is right at the bottom of my list of career choices. Personally I think that’s one of the worst jobs in the world. And no way I am able to be a scientist. Talk about day dreaming at a young age.

42: Are you an introvert or extrovert?
Introvert. Hands down.

43: When was the last time you drank?
I don’t  drink.

44: How many pillows do you sleep with?
1. The more pillows I have, the more they need to be washed, and I am lazy.

45: Are you a “safe” driver?
I don’t  drive. But given the fact that I have a very poor sense of direction and orientation, I guess not.

46: Something that’s bothering you right now?
Yes a lot of things in fact.
-Exam results to be released in less than a week.
-I don’t feel like re-editing the marketing proposals needed for CCA but I have to get them done by this week.
-I am hitting a dead end for my work.
-Someone is irritating me on Facebook.
-I am still waiting for Prince Charming to drop from the sky.

47: How many cds do you own?
Too many to count.

48: How many books do you own?
Too many to count as well!

49: How many aunts and uncles do you have?
Around 20 I think. Do distant relatives and ancestors count?

50: “Top 5” [Something]
The most difficult question ever. Okay how about a “Top 5 things I have to do before I die”?
1.Travel to North Korea
2. Travel to Shangri-La. As in the county in China not the hotel
3. Get married
4. Adopt a cat
5. Do partner yoga with my husband LOL

Okay that’s all and thank you for your time if you managed to read till the end. Till next time…

And still feeling cranky.

Oh and here is a view from my workplace. Presenting to you a big concrete slab! 

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Thoughts Inside a Skyscraper

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I love to look at skyscrapers. More specifically, the ones located at the central business district. They are a sight to behold regardless of the timings of the day.

Just visualize. 

In the day, they are like giants soaring against the bright blue sky laden with white fluffy clouds. I love this imagery because they represent the vision that the sky is not the limit. At night, the activity of skyscrapers continue with the vibrant lighting, whereby the sight is enough to make people stop and appreciate the man-made beauty. Personally, they remind me that the future might be better somehow, given the sophistication the city has reached and will be capable of reaching more in the future.

What I dislike however, is the life that goes on inside these buildings.

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When I was a haken-giri before entering university, my working experience was one of stifling. Everyday from Monday to Friday, it was just a mundane process of entering office- sitting in front of the computer- dealing with things I have ABSOLUTELY no interest in- repeat that from 9-6, excluding 1 hour lunch break, for 7 months- and feeling unappreciated sometimes.

I just cant tolerate the fact that one’s freedom is nothing but bounded by a desk, a computer and a phone. Even though I sometimes like routines, 8 hours of sedentary lifestyle is way too much. I like it when there are events to attend, platforms to interact with different people, or opportunities to conduct on-site surveillance. Basically anything just to get me active (excluding smoking and then return back to office) instead of sitting down in a cramped space and feeling restless .

The above is just my experience as a temporary worker. But I am sure what I experienced is the life of tons of salarymen/women out there. I dont know how they managed to tolerate the restrictiveness for years. 7 months was already unbearable for me.

As much I dislike studying, a working environment where people are so god damn particular about details like lunchtime hours and tying you to the desk is just as irksome. Although the current place where I am interning at is more flexible (they even gave us interns the choice to work from home or at the outlets- but I chose the option of working in office), I cant imagine how my working life will turn out in the future, or the routine of my very 1st job, or the company environment of my next internship.

Yeah that pretty sums up my thoughts and my love-hate relationship with skyscrapers. Marveling at their spectacular heights makes you want to soar. But once you enter them, you have the feeling of minuscule and insignificance (unless you are some company director or something of that kind). Oh the irony.